Blog

Let’s Start Over…

Posted by on Sep 8, 2020 in Blog | 0 comments

When I became a Life Coach in 2012, it changed my life for the better. Then when I heard the words from God, “You Matter”, it changed the trajectory of my life coach mentality and business. Every single day I have tried to honor this page and post something to all of you. Something to help you, make your day a little brighter, guidance in love, ways to get you unstuck and living your bets life, and to help you understand that you only have one life so why not make it great. Let the world know you existed, and lived out your purpose. I was reminded yesterday as to why I started this life coach journey, because I haven’t been posting much lately. So, I recommit to doing better for you! Here goes our journey together again. You Matter

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Jesus, Come – 10/52 Blog 2020

Posted by on Jun 1, 2020 in Blog | 0 comments

Jesus, please return, the world needs you now more than ever. 

There is a disregard for human life, millions of hurting people, darkness invading light, horror scenes occurring in real life and no longer a vision in movies, and violence and death.  There are people sleeping under bridges, attacks for voicing an opinion, justified statements for committing illegal acts, people selling people, drugs and alcohol addictions, and church’s doors closed while the majority of the Church (Christians) remains quiet.  We need prayer, we need peace, we need Jesus.

I’m ready for my eternal home!  If you took your last breath, would you be headed to Heaven?  If you are unsure, please contact me.

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Honesty – 9/52 Blog 2020

Posted by on May 29, 2020 in Blog | 0 comments

An enormous disservice occurs when we are unable to be honest with ourselves and with others.  What is honesty and what isn’t honesty?  Imagine making a promise, not keeping it.  Imagine getting fully paid for a job and only putting in a partial effort.  Imagine getting too much change back from the cashier and not saying anything, and the cashier getting fired for being too short in their cash drawer at the end of the shift.  Imagine taking another drink then getting into your car and driving, possibly having a risk of getting into a car accident and killing someone.  Imagine being on a diet, and sneaking that cookie while no one was looking.  Imagine portraying to be a good father and husband then secretly watching porn or sharing inappropriate videos with your buds.  Imagine someone being kind then others beginning to take advantage of their kindness.  Imagine being jealous of someone who worked really hard and won an award or got the promotion, but you didn’t get the same because you didn’t work as hard and belittle the accomplishments.  Imagine waking up early or staying late practicing for hours for something you want to become better in while others don’t do the same, yet try to get the same rewards.  Now, ask yourself, am I really honest with myself and with others?

People say they want the truth, yet when given the truth or provided with an honest assessment, most people will deny what is conveyed to them before being honest with themselves.  Feelings get hurt, pride sets in, and ego creates a disillusion generating discomfort, dishonesty, and disagreement.  As a result, the truth teller is marked as harsh while the person who asked for the truth is left never accepting the truth, growing from the truth, and becoming ultimately better from the truth.  What a sad circumstance in life!

The best thing we can do with ourselves is be honest with ourselves.   When we can look into the mirror and be proud of what we see looking back at us is the ultimate trophy we should all aspire to attain.

When people think of you, what kind of person do they think of?

When people state your name, what type of words do they use?

When your obituary gets printed, what type of legacy have you left?

Honesty is beautiful gift, yet undervalued and underutilized. For the second half of 2020, let’s be intentional with being honest in words, actions, thoughts while being honest with others.

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Bloom Where You’re Planted? – 8/52 Blog 2020

Posted by on Mar 5, 2020 in Blog | 0 comments

As a born optimist, I lived by the popular cliché, “Bloom where you’re planted” until I experienced a circumstance myself which contradicted everything I believed in.

Bloom where you’re planted means a person should take advantage of the opportunities they have in their life and be grateful for the present situation.  While I strongly believe in being grateful for opportunities, I now believe you can be miserable in opportunities, but the grateful part is the lesson you learn.

Imagine trying to fit a round peg into a square hole, as you attempt to force it to go into the square hole over and over again, it won’t fit and you end up damaging the peg and reshaping the square hole, which is also damaged.  Now take a flower seed and bury it in rocks, or in the desert, or in soil overgrown with weeds and insects, or in a swamp, or in a pot with sand.  As much as you water that seed, do you think the flower will ever grow from a seed, or better yet, even bloom?  Nope.  Therefore, the answer is to not bloom where you’re planted because it’s impossible.  Solution is you don’t change the flower; you change the environment.

There are times when opportunities just don’t fit us, and as much as we can try and want things to work, it will make us miserable in the process.  Our futile attempts to turn things around leave us saddened, angry, and confused.  We won’t understand what we’re doing wrong, why the situation isn’t working, and we become consumed with fixing it.  But guess what, it will never be fixed, because it’s not us, it’s the environment.  Friend, a flower doesn’t change….EVER!  A rose is a rose, a sunflower is a sunflower, a daisy is a daisy, a carnation is a carnation, etc.  You can’t change what it is, or who you are.  But what you can change is the environment a flower grows in.  You can change the environment you grow in. 

Recognize when things are working well, and when they’re not, understand it’s not you.  It’s the environment.  Negativity, a bad boss, a bad relationship, a harmful friend or family member, a precarious situation to your good mental health….you must remove yourself.  Life is too short and time is too valuable to waste it on people, places, and things that will never allow you to grow into the best version you can be.  There will be environments where you just don’t fit, so I pray you don’t stay in that situation for years as you attempt to fix you or the situation….that will never serve you well.  So, for you to live your best life, don’t change the flower and bloom where you’re planted, change the environment and bloom into what you’re born to become.  You Matter!

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Forgiveness – 7/52 Blog 2020

Posted by on Feb 21, 2020 in Blog | 0 comments

Here’s the BLUF – you will be hurt by others.  Tears will be inevitably shed because none of us are alone in this world, even though some of us wished we would be. 

The hurt, pain, heartache, and crying could be from the culprit who directed their intentional misconduct your way.  Let’s agree to label that cruel person a jerk!  Or, from a person with a misguided error who didn’t mean to cause anyone harm, but unfortunately did.  Bless their hearts!  Or, the mishap could have been from a clueless human who just wasn’t aware of their wrongdoings and/or surroundings.  That’s when you try to be like Jesus when He was on the cross.  Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.”  Luke 23:34

In these three different instances, you have some options on how to move forward, but no matter what forgiveness is the common denominator.  Forgiveness isn’t for them, especially if they didn’t deserve it.  Forgiveness is for you because it releases resentment, bitterness, and pain.  When you release the darkness, you automatically become lighter in body, mind, and spirit. It’s medicine to your soul.    

Let’s talk about forgiving the jerk!  You can definitely forgive them, yet not want anything to do with them.  It’s called self-care for your mental health protection and intellectual and emotional preservation.  These jerks need to understand that forgiveness is for past reconciliation and not for future consideration.  You can treat them like a human being with kindness if you see them, but, in all truth, you don’t have to socialize with them ever again.  You can love them from a distance.  You can accept their apology, if there is one, but understand words are cheap, changed behavior is the result everyone should seek.  Boundaries are real, so create, enforce, and don’t second guess yourself with the things you need to maintain a healthy you. 

For the bless their hearts and the clueless human….their unintentional err was just that – unintentional.  You can choose to hold a grudge, or you can help them not make the same mistake twice.  You can voice your heartache and pray they hear and understand so another person never has to feel how you feel.  Your decision to help them when they don’t deserve it is called grace.  If more people extended grace, there would be less resentment and revenge in the world.  After grace is extended, you can decide how you want to proceed.  Give them a second chance to turn their wrong into right, hold them at arm’s length, or decide to not put yourself into another opportunity to be inadvertently hurt. What a precarious position!  Only you can decide which way to go, so don’t allow anyone to force you into doing something that you don’t want to do, or you’re not ready to do. This is your life, no one else’s. 

Like all of you, I’ve been intentionally hurt, betrayed, lied about, taken advantage of, and talked about in a bad light.  Some by those I Loved. Trusted.  Needed.  Believed in. And, none of them deserved forgiveness, but bitterness and hate are qualities I don’t want to energize me.  I choose love.  To let go.  Overcome.  Peace.  Kindness. Spending time on things that matter.  Surrounding myself with people of quality.  I choose to forgive…because I am forgiven.  You can do it too!

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– When you know what’s right and still choose wrong – 6/52 Blog 2020

Posted by on Feb 5, 2020 in Blog | 0 comments

Decisions are the navigation for the direction of our life, and where we end up is based on how we choose.

If we were honest with ourselves, we would freely admit that we are selfish, insatiable people. We want the perks – enjoyment, fulfillment, happiness, love, contentment, money – now. We don’t want to wait; we want to fill the emptiness with the longing of our hearts desire. The sad thing about our unwillingness to wait is we will usually suspend the greatness we could have later for the mediocrity of what we get now. Then regret begins to form and we get mad at ourselves for giving into the cravings of our flesh. It’s an unhealthy never-ending toxic cycle, and if we truly want what’s right for us, we must break the cycle of what’s wrong with us.

It’s not hard to do what is right, but we make it so. We know we should eat the broccoli instead of the cheeseburger. Listen to a podcast instead of music with profanity and nasty lyrics. Read a book instead of gossiping at the lunch table. Being kind to the people who treated us unkindly. Staying away from the jerk who is no good for us and going nowhere in life. Standing firm in our boundaries even when others try to make us feel guilty for bettering our future. It’s hard. But, it’s a must. How we treat our body now will better protect it from disease and illness later. What we fill our mind with now will better preserve our thinking and development. How we allow others to treat ourselves will be an open door to pain or a closed door to joy. Who we love will make us better or make us worse, smiles ready to chase our dreams or tears with doubt, hurt, and insecurity? Sadly, I’ve seen more people choose what’s wrong for them and they live in hardship having to fight battles that could have been avoided. Regret then becomes their outcome as they reflect back at what could have been.

So, let me help you choose what’s right. Here are a few tips: 1. Your awareness level must be focused on the environment around you, because the second you stop being attentive is the second you may end up where you never wanted to be. 2. You have to choose to love yourself for the long haul. When you love yourself, you will stop treating your body, mind, and heart with disrespect, dishonor, and disliking. 3. You have to choose you’re worthy of what’s right. Many times, we think we aren’t worthy of the best so we settle for what is instead of soaring to what could be. Please don’t settle anymore. There’s only one of you in a world of 7.6 billion people, that number tells me you’re pretty special. 4. Stop choosing to fill a temporary want of insatiable happiness when the permanent feeling is what you really need. Sure, it may take more time, work, energy, and even money, but it is permanent. 5. No more wanting when your needs are met, because a need is something you aren’t willing to compromise on. Wants are fleeting, but needs are a must have. Decide your best life is a need you aren’t willing to compromise on. It’s never too late to begin choosing what’s right. Start now. Your future is depending on you!

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